Hi Xxxxx,
I really appreciate the invitation to K's baby shower. I was really excited about attending but I didn't expect to contribute $35-$40 to hosting. I don't think I'm going to make it on Sunday.
Wishing all the best to K and her new addition,
Me
And then I wrote to the Mommy-to-Be this:
Hi K!
Sadly, circumstances have changed and I won't be able to go to your baby shower on Sunday. :( However, I have a gift and would love to take you out to brunch (or any other convenient meal) and give it to you. I could drive up to (your town) tomorrow if you're free. Alternatively, let me know some dates/times that work best for you!
Hope you made it back to New York safe and sound!
xoxo.
I still don't feel 100% comfortable with this whole situation but this was the best my brain could come up with. So, hopefully, the email to the hostesses is accepted with grace and the Mommy-to-be is understanding.
Situations like this make my tummy do flips!
I think this was a very good answer! and a very sweet email to your friend! I know I would appreciate that alot!
ReplyDeleteIt sounds to me like you handled this situation really well. You were nice to your friend, and polite to the women who are putting it on. Now all you can do is wait...and let us know what they say! I hope they can handle themselves as well as you did.
ReplyDeleteYou handled this situation perfectly. Good for you for offering to take the new mom out at a time that's convenient for her :)
ReplyDeleteI think you handled this well. I would not have been nearly as kind. I give you kudos for not acting as I would have. My approach is rarely the correct one.
ReplyDeleteAt least I can admit it.
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i read the previous post and definitely not proper manners ... it's tough to be involved in weddings and showers, wedding and baby versions, and especially now with the economy the way it is... it's unfortunate that the girls hosting the brunch didn't try something more economical at their end, like having a potluck brunch at someone's home, without decorations. that being said, i think you've handled it very appropriately.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Alex Keller. If the hostesses were so pressed for cash, then they should have thought of a more economical option, like a pot luck brunch. Even then, decor and favors should be covered by the ones hosting the party. I think your email was gracious to both parties. And I think it's a great idea that you offered to take the mom-to-be out on a separate occasion :)
ReplyDeleteI think you did the right thing! I understand things happen and circumstances come up... but asking $40 to contribute to a baby shower? What were they thinking?!?! Hopefully the mama understands and will appreciate anything you can do for her and the bundle of joy!
ReplyDeleteHmmmm...I just went back and read what happened. Definitely wrong...and here's the shame of it all. You probably won't be the only person to opt out. That sucks! Part of getting the honor of being in someone's wedding or hosting someone's baby shower is having to put up some of the cost. You don't pass that cost on to the guests. Tres' wrong, that's all I can say. I think you handled it BEAUTIFULLY.
ReplyDeleteI think both of your emails are great. Things like this make me a bit uncomfortable as well.
ReplyDelete