I'm married and will be posting about the wedding soon. It was amazing. My husband* said it was arguably the best night of his life. And I didn't even set out to make it the best night of anyone's life. I just wanted to:
1. Get Married. 2. Have fun. 3. Look pretty.
And I gotta say, it was a pretty successful evening.
So, it turns out that in addition to the interview that I went to yesterday, I was called to another interview for a different company today. I guess when it rains, it pours!
I chose to write about our wedding transportation today because it'll mostly just include posting pictures :) I've got a TON to do today. In addition to this interview, I told a friend that I'd go have lunch with him at one of those prix fixe type restaurants. I'm legit excited to see him because we haven't hung out much this semester. buuut, so much to do and so much time in Manhattan!
Anyway, for the transportation, we really don't have much. I mean, we're having the ceremony in the hotel that most people plan to stay and then the reception is across the street. So, there really wasn't a reason to rent a limo for the wedding party or anything.
BUT
my dad has the coolest purple car ever. so i mean, why WOULDN'T i make up an excuse to drive it around the block a couple times?
This may or may not be the most productive week of my life.
Current tasks include:
Advance Topics in Corporations final examination Interview for an internship Fly to Kansas Get Married
and if we extend the week to next 9 days we can also add the following tasks:
Christmas Honeymoon
Do you ever look at the decisions you made in your life and wonder, what was I thinking? Perhaps deciding to have my wedding 6 days after my last law school final this semester and two days before Christmas was a mistake.
I've decided to combine a couple of the categories i said I'd talk about. I won't get through them all at this rate (stupid finals!).
Invitations.
I've posted about my invitation process before so I think I'm just going to post a picture.
Overall, we were pretty happy with them - even if we did print them from our own computer. There were things with this wedding that I was willing to spend a little extra money for and super nice invitations wasn't one of those things.
Music Three of my two of my best friends have gotten married and for their ceremonies they had their musical friends play. Well, having been on the non-bride side of that transaction, I'll say that the non-bride who was playing the music wasn't as happy with the situation as the bride was. I mean, I think the friends were happy to be part of the process but I know one in particular felt very stressed (she hadn't played in awhile) and a little used.
So, despite the fact that I do have very talented friends, I really didn't want to give anyone a job like that.
side note: martha stewart weddings said in an article recently that the only "honors" you can give your friends are having them as bridesmaids. she says the rest are just "jobs." i actually agree with this. i was a guestbook attendant at one of these friend's weddings and i felt kinda useless and mostly just wished I could go sit with my friends. I didn't feel honored at all. You can absolutely feel free to disagree with me.
Anyway, the ballroom that our ceremony is held in has been around since the 20's so it's not really equipped for any electronic form of music. I mean, yes, it has outlets, but definitely no stereo system. So my choices were to bring in my own speakers or live musicians. We're doing a bit of both. We've hired two students from the University of Kansas to play the prelude and processional.
A while ago I had grappled with the idea of not actually having a processional at all but after a discussion with our pastor I feel it's right. He said that it's important to remember the solemnity of the occasion and a processional sets the mood for this. I think that I really do want this to be a fun party but he's right that the ceremony is a very serious step and if we were all hanging out beforehand it wouldn't feel as ceremonious. Again, this is something you are absolutely welcome to disagree with me about.
For the Grandparents and Parents:
For the Bridesmaids:
For Me:
I am absolutely in love with these songs. So, while you're free to disagree with me on other things, don't say anything if you don't like them. :)
We're not having any music during the ceremony because we're not doing unity candles - my fiance dislikes this tradition and i didn't care so it was out. So the next music occasion is the recessional. We're going to get a boom box of some sort (this detail has yet to be figured out. hmmm...) and plug that into the wall. And we okay'ed this song with our officiant:
Fun!
At the reception we hired a DJ. His name is Scott Simpson and so far I've really liked working with him. Something about our personalities match. Also, it says on his website, "I am familiar with all kinds of music, however I am not very country. Country music is not a staple in my music collection, but I have enough to get by as long as it isn't all night. This is your party and I work for you. I will arrive to the party location 1 hour before guests are to arrive for setup."
I feel comfortable that country music will not be rearing its ugly head at the wedding with a DJ that says straight up on his website that he doesn't really do country. I have probably about 5 country songs that I'm okay with in my life. I don't really want to worry about it getting played tons. This is point number 3 that you're free to disagree with me on.
While we're eating dinner, my fiance and I have decided to go with the soundtrack to Fallout 3. If you don't know what I'm talking about, I'd suggest going and asking your brother who has inevitably played or at least heard of this game. And, more than likely, you saw the tv commercials:
(i love that commercial)
I was so proud of myself when I thought of this idea. First, I love the music. Second, my fiance and I have had some GREAT memories with Fallout 3 (this aspect of our relationship is completely unexpected by anyone who meets us). Third, old people will love this type of music. Fourth, the adolescent boys (and aren't they all adolescent?) will
So then, it's on to the first dance. Don't laugh, but we've chosen this song:
And yes, probably that recording of it. There are songs out there that just have special meaning to a couple and you just can't explain why.
So, then, we've gotta do the father/daughter and mother/son thing. We're leaving that up to our parents to pick. My dad said he liked "What a wonderful world" by Louie Armstrong. It's pretty expected but still a good song.
After that, we dance all night long to eighties music and whatever the DJ feels people are loving. (i made a promise to a friend that the macarena would not make an appearance. a promise I was happy to make.)
Hmm... I think I've covered all the music at this point.
I just got out of my Evidence final an hour ago. That explains my absence the last few days. I will be blogging tomorrow, Wednesday (thursday i have my last final) and Friday for sure though. After that, it'll be getting close to weddin' time!
In the meantime, check out this sale. It's a super cute idea! (and a VERY limited time offer)
I had visions of grandeur when we started our honeymoon process. I really really wanted to go to Montserrat. Like, so bad. source Source I'm not sure how it got into my head that that's the perfect place for us... But, after a lot of research, we just couldn't afford it. And there went that.
And I mean, that will be nice. And very inexpensive since we don't need to pay for our hotel room. buuut, I gotta admit. I was still really disappointed that we weren't going any place new.
My fiance picked up on that and we started exploring more options. And then he said, "What about Vegas?" We've sorta been wanting to take this trip so we looked into airfare/hotels. It didn't seem too bad! So, we decided to split the trip. Half our honeymoon in Breckenridge, half in Las Vegas.
I think it will be a fun mix. It's not a beautiful beach but airfare for two people (KS-> CO -> NV ->NY), car rental, and hotel for the whole trip ended up only being $1350 total.
So, all in all, I'm excited about the trip. I've never been to Vegas before so it'll be something new!
I gotta tell you, I'm incredibly excited about our venues. My hometown has a lot of character to it and I really wanted something that would represent my youth (haha - as if I'm not still a youth!) and the town well. I feel like our venues do this amazingly well.
The Rehearsal Dinner : The Castle Tea Room
When I was a kid, my grandma knew the owner of this magnificent mansion. So, I'd go over and play scrabble with the owner and she'd give my sister and me free ice cream. Since then, the owner has passed and The Castle Tea Room is owned by a trust. I still have a lot of memories there so it was a wonderful choice for the rehearsal dinner.
The Ceremony: The Eldridge Hotel
Originally it was called the Free State Hotel and when it was built in 1855, it was a place for settlers to stay while they were building their homes. But, then a year later, pro-slavery activists (jerks) came over from Missouri and burned it down. It was rebuilt by Col. Eldridge who said that he'd rebuild it every time it was destroyed. Well, that was an unfortunate bit of foreshadowing because it was destroyed again by jerks from Missouri in 1863. Then, in 1925, they decided to rebuild it again (but this time it WASN'T because it was torn down by pro-slavery raiders - it just needed to be fixed up).
With all that history, how could I not choose this place? The really cool thing is that the chandeliers in the ballroom that we're holding the ceremony are the original chandeliers from 1925. It's so glamorous! (source)
Reception: Liberty Hall
Liberty Hall is a movie theater by day and concert venue by night. And on the night of December 23rd, it'll be my reception venue!
Picking a Caterer I imagine my hunt for a caterer wasn't like most other peoples. Mostly, mine was budget driven. And I definitely didn't have a vision. I mean, kudos to those of that do/did but it just wasn't there for me.
In general, I was looking for someone who:
-wouldn't charge an arm and a leg -is easy-going and gets that I'm not a BRIDE but a gal who's getting married soon -can deal with the fact that my venue has nothing close to resembling a kitchen
I interviewed a few in Kansas City and a few in Lawrence. One was cheap but was all about the "wedding is the best day of your life we'll make it perfect for you of course you want these expensive add-ons that make our package more expensive because this is your perfect day." One seemed nice but was out of my price range.
One agreed to meet with me without asking my wedding date. I had emailed her saying I had a wedding in late December (I like waiting to spring the whole Wednesday aspect of my wedding until they give me a first quote because then they feel obligated to drop the price by about 50% - I'm telling you, Wednesday works FOR YOU.) Anyway, after we talk a little about the wedding she asks the date and I tell her and she says, "Oh. We don't work between Dec 22 and Dec 26." Now tell me, if you were meeting someone for a wedding in late December and you knew you had black out dates in late december, wouldn't you make sure that the wedding and the black out dates didn't coincide?
Anyway, through all this, I found Terri from Southern Accent Catering. It wasn't one of those things where I met her and I just knew but I found myself comparing the other caterers to her so I figured that if she was my standard, then I might as well go with her.
Unique Aspect The interesting thing about how pricing worked out for me was that I had something to offer caterers.
Meat.
My father is a bigwig at a very large beef packing company. This, let me tell you, has had its perks growing up. For instance, it has forever lowered my tolerance of subpar beef. The wedding perk? My dad is providing the beef to my caterer. Because of this, two things:
1. I got a 32% discount per person. 2. I know that the beef that I serve my guests will be high quality.
Honestly, I don't think I would have been able to afford Southern Accent otherwise. But Terri was totally open to the idea and heavily discounted the meal so I definitely don't regret my decision.
The Meal So, obviously, beef will be the main course. The funny thing is that I don't remember what the sides will be. I trust Terri will make the right choice and like I said, I never really had a vision for the day.
I originally really wanted plated meals over buffets because I think plated meals are so classy. But, the lack of venue kitchen combined with the fact that we're having beef meant that she couldn't feasibly serve the food plated. so, she came up with a brilliant idea. She's going to plate the salad course and have it waiting for people when they come in. Then for the main course, people will go up to the buffet. I think this is a great idea.
Another thing I had to think about was what to do for the people who don't eat beef. While this is considered sacrilege in my dad's side of the family (my dad's oldest brother also works for a beef company and my grandpa did too) my best friend/bridesmaid is a vegetarian.
The buffet kinda scared me though. I mean, at the last wedding I went to w/ my best friend, the veggie option was sitting out on the buffet and people didn't quite understand that it was an "either/or" option. SO, they took both and by the time my best friend and her vegetarian husband got to the food, there wasn't any of the veggie option left. They ate raw vegetables and cheese for dinner that night.
I told Terri about this and she came up with another genius plan. What we'll do is give the vegetarians a special card. They'll go through the line like everyone else to get the side dishes and instead of having beef put on their plate at the end, they'll hand the card to the server and he'll go to the back and bring out their plate of mushroom lasagna.
-------
All in all, I'm very happy with my decision. My caterer totally understands what I'm going for and I'm confident that the guests will get full.
I interviewed a few caterers with my dad back in August. He's not paying for the wedding or anything, I just thought it'd be a fun bonding experience. Anyway, one of the catering hopefuls asked what my plans were for a cake and I said, "Oh, I don't think we'll have one." And my dad turns to me and says, "No cake??? It's not a wedding without CAKE." And the caterer chimes in and says, "seriously. it's definitely not a wedding without a cake."
Well, I can't fire my dad but I definitely didn't hire the caterer.
Also, for as manly a front as my dad puts on, he's got a lot of funny ideas about what weddings do and do not need. Another example is how he insists that we have iced tea. "I've never been to a wedding without iced tea. You better have it sitting out on the tables." Iced tea, dad? I actually find these things quite endearing. Who knew he was going to have such strong feelings about iced tea and cake?
The positive thing about my dad is that after he has these outbursts he gets this hilarious yet indescribable look on his face and says something to the effect of, "do what you want. it's your day." And he means it. but i know he wants cake.
ANYWAY, despite the fact that we decided no cake, we still want dessert and it doesn't come with the catering package that decided on. So, we're going with giant cookies! source
The idea came to my fiance one day when we were sitting watching tv. He turned to me and joked that instead of cake we should just have a giant cookie. And then we kinda looked at each other and were like, "wait... why do we have to be joking about this?"
My mom bought me a cookie cake for my birthday this year from Eileens's Colossal Cookies to make sure that it wouldn't be a disaster. It was actually REALLY cool. (too bad I don't have a pic...) So that settled it.
source
Over Thanksgiving, my fiance and I ordered 4 at about $17 each which works out to be about $1 per person. (not so bad) Each of the four will have a different design representing part of our life together:
The NYC skyline (representing new york, obviously) A Windmill (our midwest roots) The Great Wall (our time in China) Replica of our Wedding invitation (newlyweds!)
I'm really excited about it. My bday cookie had the nyc skyline and it totally rocked.
...and I think I'm going to get a mini cake and put it at my dad's place setting.
I guess fashion can be taken to justmean "clothes." But fashion just sounds fancier, right?
The Rings: I guess rings are clothing but would still fall under "fashion" right? I'm totally justified in calling this post "Fashion"!
As you know from the name of my blog that I love Audrey Hepburn (the blog name comes from an Audrey quote). (In fact, I even plan to name my first born daughter Audrey! - okay okay, not because of Audrey Hepburn. My Great Grandmother's name is Audrey.) Further, Breakfast at Tiffany's is my all time favorite movie - the one movie that can calm me down no matter what bad mood I happen to be in.
SO, my fiance said the "where" of buying the ring was obvious. Aren't I a lucky girl? My band is matching w/o diamonds or anything: His band is also from Tiffany's. We debated about this because buying all this stuff from Tiffany's was going to wear down our bank accounts quite a bit and we could get a white gold band from Kays for CONSIDERABLY less than a platinum band from Tiffany's. But ultimately, I wanted him to have platinum and he wanted his ring from, "a nice place too." And it's not like we're buying a pair of shoes here. This is something he'll wear everyday for the rest of his life. So, back to Tiffany we went. (not that walking into that store saddens me a bit.) And got this:
I wanted to get him a thicker band (it was only a few hundred more and at this point, what's a few hundred among friends?) but he said he didn't like the thin or thick one any better or worse so why pay extra? I guess he had a point - also, this is the first time, like, ever that he was the one saying we shouldn't buy the more expensive thing and I was the one saying we should. Who knew? His suit: We bought his suit at Jos. A. Banks when they were having a sale for a suit, shirt and tie for $199. He's mid-adjustment (and chatting on the phone) when I took this picture but I gotta say, he's a very attractive!Man-cessories: I posted about these here. But I'll add the pictures anyway. The socks don't exactly fit into the color scheme but they were fun and who's gonna see them? Also, I'm not sure why the ties and pocket squares look so vastly different in the pics. They're much closer to the same color in person.
(calvin klein)
(from a thrift store called Baltic Bazaar)
(Express)
My fiance will be wearing the socks and the pocket square but will have a plain black tie. We gotta set him apart somehow.
Bridesmaid Dresses: As with most of this stuff, I've posted about it before. Like I said before, it's nice to have it all in one place. I'm SO supremely happy with these. Over thanksgiving I finally showed it to one of my bridesmaids (it's a long story as to why we bought the dress w/o her involvement and she's seeing it for the first time 1 month before the wedding - not her fault though!). It was great to watch her fact because it started out with like, sorta doubtful as we walked up the stairs but when she saw the dress her eyes lit up. And honestly, I'm a little disappointed I didn't buy one for myself. They're Calvin Klein dresses but we bought them at ideeli. Ideeli is the best. It's by invite only - do you want to join? Use this invite. I tried ShopItToMe and Gilt Groupe and I really think ideeli has better discounts and is easier to use.
Anyway, I told the girls that they could buy whatever black shoes they want. I've had questions about whether it's okay if they use shoes they already have, if they need to be flat/heels, if there can be embellishments. Like, seriously ladies, I don't care. I said that if they need guidance, get plain black pumps. But really, I'm sure you're feet will be lovely no matter what.
Ladies' Accessories My gift to my bridesmaids is their jewelry for the wedding. I know that's pretty stereotypical and maybe not very personalized but they're pearls and so lovely!
What I haven't figured out is what I'm going to wear. I have all of the above jewelry (because come on, when I was buying for them, I had to buy for me too, right??) but then I also have a necklace that looks a lot like this: Source
But mine is a little closer to choker length. I'm not sure if it's too short or if I think it matters. I'll have to take both and decide when I have the dress on.
My shoes: my gorgeous gorgeous shoes. They're from Nina Shoes. I totally splurged on them but they're so perfect. When I saw them I almost jumped out of my chair. Yes. Perfect.
Veil: I bought it off craigslist. She said that it was something like $400 when she bought it but I got it for $80. That was more than what I wanted to spend but it was a pretty good deal all in all. In this picture it's on top of her hair, I think I'll put mine underneath my hair. I think of all the things on here, the veil is the thing I'm the least happy with. Not that I'm saying I'm unhappy about it. Just not ecstatic the way I am about those shoes. (my perfect perfect shoes.)
My Dress: Of course, I saved the best for last! Drumroll, please? Here are a couple views of the fabulousness:
I bought it from Paula Varsalona in the city. It's simple but it's gorgeous. (the pics sadly don't do it justice)
-----
Did I miss anything? (it's a pretty long post so i bet not...)
Craigslist will be a recurring theme in these posts. For instance, I found my hair dresser after putting out an ad on craigslist. She will be doing my hair, my 4 bridesmaids and my flower girl for $125. Not bad!
I want something natural-ish. Like, "wow - she's gorgeous. did she roll out of bed with her hair looking that good?" Well, not roll out of bed natural but not spiral-curls-with-baby's-breath done. Something like this:
Make-Up Another Craigslist score. This time I didn't put out the ad but found her ad. Get this, she's doing the same girls that are having their hair done for free. How is this, you say? Well, she's a former wedding planner turned Mary Kay consultant.
I think she either misses the business or is trying to get back in it. Either way, score!
Because of her generousity, I gotta plug Mary Kay for a second. I don't use their products on a regular basis but I must say that they have a wonderful business. My mom sold it for awhile when I was a kid and there was something about the structure that empowered women to find success. I went to some of their meetings and it wasn't all SELL SELL SELL - a lot was "how I plan to meet my goals and lead a fulfilling life."
On top of that, I looked fab at my make-up trial. My sister kinda looked like she got punched in the face though... maybe I should tell her to lay off the purple/brown eye shadow.
Nails My third beauty goal was to get all my girls a manicure. To my dismay though, the only quote I got was $20 PER GIRL plus travel fees. This is despite the fact that 2 of the girls are under the age of 12 and would only get a paint. Ridic!
For those of you not from the Midwest, manicures seem to be the ONLY thing more expensive than in New York. Here, my fav manicurist charges $7.40+tip. There? I don't have a fav manicurist because it's $13+tax/tip on the low end.
So, I'm not sure what to do. i LOVE manicures and i'd love to share the experience with my girls but I can't stomach that kind of money...
Skin I have psoriasis. Have I mentioned this before? Okay, I'm going to be gross and post a picture of what this looks like. (it isn't a pic of me - i found this off a medical website) Source Mine isn't quite as bad as this one but it is pretty much all over my body. I can get it to be unnoticeable if I'm very very vigilant with my medicine. The problem is that the most effective one for me, shown here:
is incredibly oily. AND it's soooo time consuming. But I guess this is my wedding and if i want to get this under control, i gotta make the time!
Face After this post, I had one heck of a break out. I'm telling you THREE monster zits. I think it had something to do with Thanksgiving. Excessive food. Weird schedule where I didn't wash my face. Little water drinking. I'm learning from that experience and vigilantly washing, moisturizing, and water drinking.
Anyway I decided to buy another product. It's like a Proactiv off-brand. I can't remember the brand but it's really clearing up my face. Fingers crossed that it will last for another 2.5 weeks.
------
So, that's what's going on with the beautification of the wedding. I'm thinking about bringing up the topic of a professional shave for my fiance...
With 19 days and 3 finals before the final, I decided to make this easier on myself. For the days leading up to the big day, I'm going to write about specific wedding categories. These are the ones I came up with:
Hair, Make-up, Beauty Fashion Cake Catering Venue Honeymoon Invitations Music & Entertainment Officiant Photographer Planning Transportation Video
Am I missing anything? Some of these are repeats from things I've blogged about in the past. But I figure the difference is that now, I've got it all planned (in theory) so what I say now is actually what will happen at the wedding, right? And here's something new since I'll be in front of my computer everyday until December 17 studying: Saturday and Sunday posts!
Leave me a comment if there's something you'd like to be included that I didn't list above. Also, if there's a topic you're more excited about than others, let me know that too and I'll spend more time on it.
HOLY COW. Do you see the wedding countdown?? 20 days!
Yesterday marked the three week mark but for some reason it didn't hit me the way that 20 days is hitting me.
For the lovely married ladies out there, when did it hit you that you were really getting married? I feel like i've had about 10 of the moments! The funny thing is that I probably won't even realize that I'm married until like, a week after it happens. Being married is what adults do. I'm still a kid! (can 25 yr olds still be a kid? sure feels like it sometimes!)
have you ever heard of the phrase, "throwing money at the problem"? It's a fav in our little household.
and i gotta tell ya, with as much planning and good intentions that I had a year ago, we will definitely going to be throwing money at whatever problems we may encounter. For anyone new to my blog, I'm in law school. My finals start next week. My last one is on December 17. I get to Kansas on Saturday Dec 19. I get married on Wednesday, December 23rd. (do you ever have those, what was I thinking moments? sometimes i seriously over-estimate myself...)
As it is, the wedding planning stops during finals time. Given this, as problems arise, I will be shoving money at the problems that fall at my feet. If my dwindling bank account could speak it'd say, "Go away wedding! She's studying!"
So, my suggestion for you gals that are just starting out this wedding process, plan to be below budget by about 5-10% when you're a month out. I promise secret things will creep up on you and THAT'S where you go over that carefully planned budget. Well, that's what I'm watching happen to me at this very moment.
incidentally, do you know of some inexpensive gifts for groomsmen and ring bearers?
We definitely have not heard back from everyone. I totally realize that this wedding doesn't occupy the minds of everyone. But honestly, I don't want it to occupy mine for much longer. I have finals coming up and I completely DO NOT have time to track down people. I don't see why it's okay to not respond!
We have heard back from a few people. ...plus their girlfriends who were not invited. It would be lovely to invite everyone plus a date. but we can't. and we didn't. and that aside, if someone's name wasn't on the invitation, why would someone assume they could come? i think the explanation is, "people are just dumb." (as my fiance put it) but now we have to deal with the uncomfortable situation of telling them not to bring their significant others. awkward!
Here are some funny cartoons that speak to the situation:
Audrey Hepburn once said, "If I get married, I want to be very married." Me too! <------ still true. however, as i've moved on past wedding planning, it's worth noting that most of the content on this site has little to do with being married. mostly, it's about twenty-something law grad living in nyc. mostly.
We're staying at the Venetian.
source
Man-cessories:
(calvin klein)
(from a thrift store called Baltic Bazaar)
(Express)
;)
Source
Yes. Perfect.
I bought it off craigslist. She said that it was something like $400 when she bought it but I got it for $80. That was more than what I wanted to spend but it was a pretty good deal all in all. In this picture it's on top of her hair, I think I'll put mine underneath my hair. I think of all the things on here, the veil is the thing I'm the least happy with. Not that I'm saying I'm unhappy about it. Just not ecstatic the way I am about those shoes. (my perfect perfect shoes.)
I bought it from Paula Varsalona in the city. It's simple but it's gorgeous. (the pics sadly don't do it justice)
